


In Which Harry Dresden Overturns The Laws Of The Universe For His Daughter’s Birthday

by TheLittleMuse



Category: The Dresden Files - Jim Butcher
Genre: F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-04
Updated: 2017-12-04
Packaged: 2019-02-10 17:46:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12917016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLittleMuse/pseuds/TheLittleMuse
Summary: Maggie wanted a fancy smartphone … thingy … for her birthday. Well, Harry couldn’t give her something that would break before he’d even given it to her. There was only one thing to do.Do something about thing "break technology with your mere presence" thing.





	In Which Harry Dresden Overturns The Laws Of The Universe For His Daughter’s Birthday

“So, Magpie, what do you want for your birthday?”

She looked up at me with those big brown eyes and lips wibbling in a way that made my knees weak. Mouse mirrored her expression perfectly. “Can I get an iPhone?” she said. She misread my panicked expression immediately, “It doesn’t have to be the latest model or anything, it can be one of those second-hand refurbished ones. I just want something to text my friends, play music and go on the internet with. I won’t download any of those freemium games, I promise, and I won’t go over my data limit.”

She might as well have been talking a different language for all I could understand her, but to be honest, I wasn’t worried about the cost. Since I had stolen a pile of diamonds from the Underworld I was doing okay, which was a first in my life.

No, what I was worried about was the fact I’d most likely destroy the phone before I’d even got it out of the shop.

I was about to tell Maggie it wasn’t possible and was there anything else she wanted? But I’m a sucker for my little girl and what actually came out of my mouth was, “Of course, Maggie, anything you want.” She squealed and jumped into my arms. I swear, that wasn’t what I meant to say, then again, my brain and my mouth don’t often communicate.

 

…

 

“This is a disaster,” I said to Murphy as we sat in my new apartment.

“So, just tell her it wasn’t possible and get her something else,” said Murphy calmly. Reasonably.

“But she’ll be upset,” I said, maybe a little overdramatically.

“Maybe that’s okay,” said Murphy, patting my hand.

“But she’ll get one eventually. All the kids I see are surgically attached to the things. And then I’ll break it. And then I’ll be the worst Dad ever,” I said miserably.

Murph snorted into her coffee. “Maybe you’re taking this a little hard, Harry. It’s going to be fine.”

I sighed, trying to get my thoughts straight, “Fine,” I said. “Fine. But it’s not just Maggie. The whole technology thing is becoming more of a problem all the time. It wasn’t always like this, obviously. Wizards have always had some kind of weird effect on the world, but it used to be things like milk curdling and boils. Which I am very glad not to have, by the way, I would just also be very glad if we could move on from anti-technology fields to … something else.”

“Well, there’s nothing you can do,” she said. Then saw the look on my face. “No,” she said. “Harry, no. Whatever you’re thinking of. No. You can’t do anything. You can’t change the laws of the universe.”

“Of course,” I said absently.

“Fuck,” said Murphy quietly.

 

…

 

I started doing research, out of purely theoretical interest. After all, it was like Murphy said, I couldn’t change the laws of the universe.

And then it hit me.

 _I_ couldn’t change the laws of the universe, but I knew beings that could. Specifically one being. One very scary being who I was currently working for and who probably owed me a solid by now. She just needed to be brought round to be my point of view.

I was so dead.

I cleared my mind, set up my summoning circle and prepared to do my best bowing and scraping. I am not good at bowing and scraping.

“Mab. Queen of the Winter Fae. Queen of Air and Darkness. I have needs speak with you. Come.”

The wind whipped around me and I knew from past experience that the temperature dropped would have dropped dramatically, though I didn’t feel it like I used to. Then, just like that, Mab was before me, as frighteningly beautiful as always.

I bowed my head, “My Queen.”

“My Knight, why have you summoned me?”

“I have a request.”

“Oh? Speak it,” she said, her mouth curving up in something close to amusement and her tone conveying the idea that if I did not provide a satisfactory answer, there would be pain. Gulp.

“You know that I have been impeded many a time by my inability to use technology-”

Mab wasn’t slow. She raised an eyebrow and interrupted me, “You wish for me to change that?”

I nodded, “Just think how much more efficient a Winter Knight it would make me if I could, say, communicate immediately using a cell phone, or find information using the internet, or, hell, go to the hospital, for just a few examples.”

Mab tapped her lips with her long finger, “I see the advantage, My Knight. But I can do this without you incurring a further debt to me, but it will be large working, and it will affect the rest of your kind. I cannot incur debts from them without their knowledge.”

I almost gave up then and there. The laws regarding the Sidhe and debts are extremely strict, but then I had another idea.

“You could take it before the Council. Technology is taking over enough that it’ll soon push us out. They’ll agree.”

Mab gave the sort of smile that made babies cry, “Oh that is brilliant. To have the entire Council in my debt.” She kissed me softly on the forehead. I shivered. What had I done?

 

…

 

I stood silent and still behind Mab as she made her address to the Council. She promised to end the wizards’ problems with technology (or “mortal ferromancy” as she called it) in exchange for one favour from each of the Senior Council. The offer drew gasps and murmurs, both of excitement and dread, the younger wizards especially knew what they could do if they didn’t blow up every electrical thing they came near, but one favour from each of the Senior Council was not something to sniff at. Mab could effectively play puppet master with all her favours. I wondered if the Senior Council was even tempted; you got on the Senior Council by being old, as in, “young when electricity was just a pipe dream” old. But Mab could spin words like nobody – nobeing else, and the younger wizards did their fare share of persuading (which I thought put the Merlin off more than anything) and a bargain was struck.

And that was how I helped change the nature of the Universe.

Things didn’t change immediately, of course, even Mab couldn’t effect a working like that in a day.

A month later Murphy took me shopping for a smart phone for Maggie. My job was to stay silent, learn, and occasionally look intimidating when the salesman tried to upsell when we really didn’t want to upsell (he didn’t realise that Murphy was the dangerous one. Idiot. That’s how we got a good deal.)

When we got home Murphy very carefully explained everything to me. I just blinked a lot. Phones had changed a bit since I was a kid. I’m not sure this could even be called a phone.

Then I realised Murph had said something.

“Hey, did you say you could put movies on this little box?”

“Yes,” said Murph slowly.

“Like, Star Wars movies?”

“No, Harry.”

“Please?”

“You’ve already shown her those movies a hundred times, she’ll put them on herself if she wants, and,” I could tell she was lining up for the kill, “how do you think Maggie would feel if she knew you had messed with her present before she got a chance to open it?”

Ouch. Right for the jugular.

“Fine,” I said. But I would have to investigate these little boxes. Imagine being able to carry around Star Wars in your pocket.

 

…

 

Maggie might be a high jumper at some point in her future because she managed to launch herself into my arms. She launched herself from the sofa, but still, my point stands.

"Daddy, thank you, I love you," she babbled.

"Oof," I said.

Maggie began showing me all the things the little box (I still refused to call it a phone, I mean, c’mon) could do. I felt the warm fuzzies spread through me. So what if I had just made one of the most powerful beings I knew exponentially more powerful? My little girl was happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, this stupid little thing basically came about with me thinking the technology thing has to be addressed at some point, right? Everything is wireless now. Chicago must have the worst wi-fi in America with Harry wandering around. People’s phones must be randomly exploding in their pockets when he’s getting ready to do magic or just angry.  
> Also, I have no idea whether Mab could help with Harry’s technology problem but eh, I don’t care, it made a fun story.


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